Ducks Aren't Real

have you ever seen one?

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ducks can’t be real because real things don’t have projectile helical penises that are longer than the rest of their body. 

ducks can’t be real because real things don’t have projectile helical penises that are longer than the rest of their body. 

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This photo clearly shows a person lying on the floor of a park with a duck puppet.  i think this might offer clarification for many of the viewers who have said “hey, i’ve totally seen a real duck at a park or some shit”.  Well motherfuckers, here you are.  Maybe this will open your fucking eyes at last.  Ever think that those “ducks” you see could actually be a stupid man with a dump puppet?
Thanks for the submission OZ!

This photo clearly shows a person lying on the floor of a park with a duck puppet.  i think this might offer clarification for many of the viewers who have said “hey, i’ve totally seen a real duck at a park or some shit”.  Well motherfuckers, here you are.  Maybe this will open your fucking eyes at last.  Ever think that those “ducks” you see could actually be a stupid man with a dump puppet?

Thanks for the submission OZ!

Filed under ducks duck zoology cryptozoology taxonomy taxology ontology biology puppets motherfuckers muppets fgaf dgaf the fuck everythig lifestyle submission

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f0ll0wy0urbliss asked: have you heard of the big duck in Flanders, NY?

Thanks for the tip f0ll0wy0urbliss this surely is a magnificent sculpture of fantasy, no?  It’s construction hints that perhaps it was once used as some sort of “Trojan Duck” in ancient times.  i can surely imagine leaving this at the doorstep of an enemy, them coming out to investigate “oh wow, a real duck? and i thought they weren’t real! better bring this inside my compound” and then BAM under the cover of night sneaking out to slaughter them and their entire family.  Perhaps that’s what the Greeks were REALLY talking about.

p.s. here’s a picture of the “duck” in question:

Filed under ducks submission duck trojan horse trojan trojan duck compounds taxonomy conspiracy conspiracies ontology zooology cryptozoology ontology